Wake up daddy

last night as I put Charlotte to bed I whispered that she needed to wake up daddy in the morning and not me. She comes into our room and starts shaking me and whispered in my ear "mommy, I am going to wake up daddy now" She tried in vain to wake him up and so I still was the one to get up. Charlotte wanted toast and Simon wanted pancakes. I never make pancakes so I thought I would be a little adventurous. I made Charlotte her piece of toast to tide her over and while I was mixing up the pancakes I heard a scream and found that one of my dogs got her toast. I finally finished the pancakes and was helping the kids out when I turn around and found my dog Mary had eaten one of my pancakes. The day was not going well. The next 8 hours or so I just did as usual and unpacked my house(an ongoing horrendous task that will never end). We had told the kids all day that we would go to the fountains at the mall after Simon's nap. There is a mall here that is all outdoor and has a street running down the middle and at one end is the ultimate in "white trash" fun. Parents park themselves on the sides and watch as their kids run around in the sprouting water. A couple nights ago I went to this same mall with a friend and we saw a man and his wife walking. He was about 4 feet tall with curly short hair on the top and long hair flowing in the back. He had on a t-shirt with the sleeves ripped off and it had 2 pigs on the front with the words "makin bacon". You can guess what the pigs were doing. These are the types of people you can expect to see around this part of town. Anway.....after I did some shopping, played in the fountains and ate dinner we were ready to go home. We were walking along and a man drives past us in his 1950's blue convertible that was about 500 feet long. He had JT blasting and his arm on the seat next to him. There was a really old grandma sporting the traditional grandma clothing, including the scarf over her hair and tyed under her chin. wait....it wasn't a real grandma though...it was a dummy. Oh my goodness, I was at a loss for words...and then.....he turned the corner slowly and the muffler on his car FELL OFF. Simon turned to me and said "that was scary"